Thursday, March 12, 2009

The great sleepover debate

From virtually the moment of my daughter's birth, I have be consciously focused to ensure her inclusion in all aspects of life.  We do things and go places that a typical family does even when issues of accessibility make it a huge hassle.  I have always wanted her to think that the whole world is hers.  I have insisted (sometimes loudly) that she always be fully included at school.  So, I should be celebrating success today; her backpack contained an invitation to a classmate's sleepover birthday party.


Yet, this has sparked a crisis.  I don’t know the parents of the girl that invited my daughter.  And while their daughter likely  has some inkling of what having my child over means, they may not.  Do I call them to explain?  How many details do I ask (can a wheelchair get into your house? Are you comfortable with my daughter's needs?)  Do I invite myself along?  And what about all of her needs (medications, emergencies)?  Do I only let her go for the evening  and miss the sleeping part? 


I am amazed at how a happy, exciting invitation can cause so many issues and concerns.  After a few deep breaths, I decide to enjoy the occasion and let my daughter enjoy the invitation.   Inclusion works; she is “one of the girls”.  Tomorrow we will figure out all the details. We have done this many times over the years; because for inclusion to work, it often takes some work on our part.

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